I just really want to start anew.
Although I’m excited to return to school this semester,it brings up a lot of questions I’ve been trying to avoid. I’m thinking about all the countless possibilities:graduate school,jobs, anew apartment. Yet,one thing is pain stakingly clear… I need to leave my hometown and move somewhere else to start over. I love lville but there’s nothing here for me. It’s a small town filled with people stuck in that mindset. Every time I come home and talk to people who stayed here I feel like I’m traveling back in time. Just the same mindsets I guess…leaving really made me correction forced me to grow up. I’m not the same girl so I can’t stay.
I feel like I really stepped into my full self in college. At first I felt like I had to adapt and fit in, but then I found such a freedom in being my real self. It’s so great. I feel like I have real friends at school who actually care what’s going on with me and 50 great sisters. They have that same mentality of wanting to explore that I don’t find in people around here. I don’t know maybe it’s just me, but I’d rather be at college than here. I only miss my parents when away.
One thing is clear: I’ve got to get away from here.